A Day at the Beach

You know, sometimes, you just have to say f*#k it! Well, today I felt a huge wave of grief welling up inside. First, I decided to honor my Virgo moon and do some housework. Down on my knees I go; a roll of paper towels and some sudsy water. My balcony tile is 18″x18″, off white and dotted with gecko droppings, geranium and vinca flower petal stains and a fine layer of grime (a combination of dirt & ocean air). With a birds-eye view of the floor only inches away I merrily used up half  a roll of paper towels. I thought a little elbow grease would lift my gloom but once back on my feet (now touching a very clean surface) my head would still not raise off my chest. I looked towards the beach, which was like a postcard. I reached in my bikini drawer and picked out the most cheerful one I own, a teeny, weeny pink and white polka dot bikini with little tinkling charms, a bottle of MSM lotion (deep hydrating) and off I went.
Immediately the ocean called. The energy of the ocean usually assists me in releasing emotion. I imagined a smile on my face and all I could do is just feel sadness. I remembered what my friend Lisa told me about letting go. Sometimes you just have to be still when there’s so much movement internally. Feelings accompanied memories of my mother and then I realized what was going on. Grieving. It’s surprising how it sneaks up on you. I woke up feeling good and then BOOM!
I lay down on my towel and fall asleep. Unconsciously, my emotions needed total stillness, so I slept. The voice of a Hawaiian man speaking his native language woke me. How gentle an awakening. Up and in the water again to wash my sadness away. Resting again on my towel a mother and daughter made a home only 3 feet away. Normally I would feel crowded but this time it was comforting to have a surrogate mother/daughter visual enjoying each other’s company so close by. Four hours passed and finally I felt lighter. My first smile came when I dunked for the last time just missing a rather large fish swimming by.
It works every time. I love and respect the ocean. I’m a water sign, Pisces, so water has great significance in my life. Look at all the Beach Party Movies, for goodness sake! Summer’s coming and you know what that means….reruns.

Hang Ten, my friends.